Early Christmas?

I gave up on Santa Claus a long time ago...until last night. I don't have a chimney here in L.A. so the fatass just came knocking on my sliding glass door. He was hopped up on Peppermint Schnapps and had some bits of chicken wing in his beard. He was quite unkempt, it being the offseason and all, but it was cool to see him.

"What the hell, old man?" I said to him as he sat down at my computer, typing youtube.com into my address bar.

"I know it's only April, but you gotta see this. Consider it an early Christmas present from me."

Then Santa brought up this video, one of about 70.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74dWyDw6Bxk

As I watched while Santa used my sink as a toilet I just sat in sheer amazement. This was truly the greatest Christmas present anyone could possibly give or get. Thank you Santa.

P.S. Not a great surprise that after I enjoyed this man's videos and life couldn't get any better, we found this. http://offender.fdle.state.fl.us/offender/flyer.do?personId=2530

Figures.