Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Chris Evans to Don the Captain's Shield

Not that I am the biggest fan of Captain America or Marvel for that matter, I find myself compelled to write at least something about this casting news. For me Captain America is in the same boat as Wonder Woman when it comes to moving to the big screen, with the Flash following in a dingy close behind. To me they look too goofy for real people to be wearing those costumes while audiences try to take them serious. I know its silly to say but on paper things work differently. As soon as a real person steps into a super hero costume, the first reaction can't be a giggle, or even an uncomfortable seat shift for that matter. You have to say "Cool" or "That's awesome", something to that affect because that's what comic books and comic book movies are, cool and awesome. Most of the time they lack the depth that the Dark Knight brought to the table though I do believe that things are changing very rapidly.

Which brings us back to Chris. In the Fantastic Four, he was perfect. The teen, action junky, heart throb, smart ass. And sadly, that is what most people remember him as. The Fantastic Four movies were some of the worst pieces of shit I have ever seen and I always look before I flush. But Chris Evans is definitely a better actor than that. He is absolutely a better actor than his movies. Sunshine is one of the few times where he actually shows his truly colors. Whether they are red, white, and blue or not, you would have to ask a Captain America fan. Plus with Hugo Weaving as Red Skull? Fuck me that sounds awesome. But that fact that an actor like Evans is now Captain America has me breathing a little easier. He's funny, smart, good looking, and jacked. Wait, am I gay?

Has Lost Lost its Way?

Quite frankly, I think Lost has sucked this season thus far. Sure there have been plenty of great moments, subtle answers, and great character work, but as a whole, it has been slowly dying. With such a great start I truly believe that this was going to be the season we all thought it would be. But alas, it is not, and even more troubling, it is far from that.

Like Tim has said before, ever episode should have some earth shattering answer or revelation about at least one of the thousand questions we have had since day one. Grant it, there have been tons of subtle answers that either solidify speculations or flat out clarify theories. Though, as Lost often does, they build answers out of vague hints or analogies that ultimately lead to more questions. Its just how they do it and we have to deal with it. I just have been completely unhappy and fed up with the season. "Sundown", Sayid's episode, was powerful and compelling because things were happening. And therein lies one of my biggest problems with the show.

Nothing is happening. Everything seems to happen in the alternate timeline, while the main story which matters and we all care about, nothing happens. Ben's episode, "Dr. Linus", the alternate timeline had a fantastic story, but on the island Ben dug a hole, ran away, and then came back. That's it. The island story is what matters and to have only that happen is piss poor for the last season of Lost. Even "Recon" Sawyer went to the Hydra Island, had a conversation with Widmore, and then came back. That's not enough! Not now. Maybe in season 3 it would have been fine but we loyal fans have waited too long for that bull shit.

The other problem is that the alternate timeline is where all the action happens. That's fine and very compelling to watch because the character work and acting is top notch but that timeline means nothing to us. Its past and its future effect nothing on the island. If Sawyer or Jack or Kate dies in that timeline, oh well. And the fact that the producers keep saying that it all makes sense in the end is frustrating. They are wasting an entire season with it, proclaiming that it all adds up later. NO! This is it. Its now or never to get it right. The last season of shows are primed for emotional story telling, for gripping action, and for down right great entertainment. And right now, Lost is not entertaining. Its boring and quite frankly annoying now.

I find myself picking about the dialogue, my eyes wonder while its on, and I talk badly about it like right now. That's now how its supposed to be. I love Lost. I think of myself as one of the biggest Lost fans. I hate that the show has brought me to this point, and that is not caring about what happens next. After every episode I love to see what's coming next and how exciting it looks, but now I know its not going to be good. I read everything I can about Lost online and IGN gives every episode 8's and 9's. They may be good TV but they are not good Lost. If you can sit down and watch it without seeing any other episode before it and enjoy it, its not good Lost. It should be full of references that casual fans won't get, flashbacks to things from previous seasons that now are revealed in a new light, and with major things happening to major characters which would move the fans that truly love these characters.

I could go on and on about this, mainly because I only know a few loyal Lost fans, being those of you that read this, that get my level of Lost fandom. Please, help me to like the show again. Leave comments that might make me feel better. I am off to watch "Ab Aeterno" which looks amazing, but we shall see.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Simpsons Creators Write Funniest Joke

Last month’s Olympic-centric episode of The Simpsons has sparked controversy over what is being seen as the funniest joke of the decade.
Quick Recap: Homer and Marge Simpson form a mixed-doubles curling team with Seymour Skinner and his mother. The team qualifies for the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver, but the Skinners see Homer as the team’s biggest weakness and plot to have him replaced. Elsewhere, Lisa becomes obsessed with collecting Olympic mascot pins and its up to Bart to save her.
The Joke: The camera pans leftwards from the National Curling Trials to a lot marked, “National Curly Trials.” We then see an expansive flock of Curly Howard impersonators mulling around, each with their own significantly exaggerated “woo-woo-woo, n’yuk, n’yuk, n’yuk, ruff, ruff,” or “n’gahh!” Moe Szyslak then spots the Curlys and exclaims, “Oh, wiseguys eh?” before slapping each in the vane of Moe Howard in one brilliant continuous strike.
While there is much debate in the entertainment world if this is literally, the funniest joke of the last ten years, without debate it clearly is.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

4 Things That Will Finally Be Answered on LOST

1. Was it Rain Lockheart's plan to reset time when he sent the particle transmission to Laura?

2. If the gruntnick gang planted the triptonium seeds in vantage point K, does Gregory still impregnate Fyvish's daughter in Clark's reality of the Reim-Chin system?

3. When the faloopadoodle puddle quake hit phillistine balm-baddosh-theremin, can Phyddyck Thistlescumps re-postulate tenacity whilst reticulating splines blundery bastionalisig kumkwatzacoatloscopy?

4. Let me get this straight...

Monday, March 1, 2010

Mormons To Be Bashed Again... Dum Dum Dum Dum Dum

Sticking with their vocation to offend everybody as often as possible, Matt Stone and Trey Parker, (creators of South Park), will be staging a Broadway musical based on the lives of members of the Church of the Latter Day Saints.

Cheyenne Jackson, (9/11 victim from United 93 or Danny from 30 Rock), an especially gay Broadway superstar is set to play the lead role, a Mormon missionary, in the show aptly titled Mormon Musical.

Stone and Parker will also be working alongside Robert Lopez, who wrote Avenue Q, the award-winning musical that dismantled the divinity of the educational children’s television standard, Sesame Street.

While the crew is making every effort to keep the details of this project “under wraps,” it is a given that it will infuriate the Mormons as the South Park team has done to countless other groups in the past few years: Blacks, Canadians, Catholics, Homosexuals, Jews, Scientologists, Old People, and of course… Mormons. The musical is slated to release off-Broadway in August of this year.